There's A Difference Between Being Lonely and Being Alone
by Purpleperson13
Summary: I was in that dark place again, everything was going wrong and it was getting harder to bottle up all the pain. And just when I'm pulling myself out of my grave, another metaphorical bombshell hits. Hints of Bubbleline. Marvelling POV.


**Hello everyone. PP13 here, I'm back at last! And I still haven't finished The Real Wonderland (which I will, don't worry) I'm just hitting a brick wall with the plot at the moment. So here's a little something to keep you occupied while I'm stuck. :)**

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Theres a Difference Between Being Lonely and Being Alone

I was in that dark place again.

That place that I hid in the depths of my heart, where no one could hear the tears beyond the deafening silence.

That place I visited when I knew I was alone, when I couldn't surround myself with people.

No one had seen me for a while and I was finding I spent more and more time in this place of fear and anger.

Today was no different.

Today, Finn and Jake were off slaying an evil troll tribe or something, Bonnibell was doing some royal shtick, and I was pretty sure Simon still had amnesia, even the rainbow pony was gone visiting the family (not that I'd ever talk to her. Sure I could understand her, understand Rainicorn that is, but there was a distinct difference between understanding a language and understanding a person).

So I sat in my dark home, in my dark cave, with my axe-bass in my lap and let my mind wonder to the pent up loneliness I kept cramming away metaphorical jars, and I sang.

"Nobody knows I survive,

How I bottle it all up inside,

How I stop from being the lonely Vampire queen,

Without anyone to relate to,

Without anyone to relate to,

So, I'm just alone,

With my thoughts,

And my fangs,

And my heart that doesn't beat anymore,

They come and they leave,

And part of me deceives me every time,

Tells my they'll stay,

But they always go away,

You always go away..."

And that's when I ran out of words.

I didn't cry, I ran out of words.

My throat didn't close from the force of the pain swelling in my undead chest, I ran out of words.

My axe-bass slipped so it sat flat on my lap, no tears hit its battle-ravaged surface, that was on of the things about being undead, you had none of the regular bodily functions normal people experience.

I could cry, but it was with pained sobs, not actual tears.

Of this I was glad, it made hiding it easier.

The sound of my sorrow echoed hollowly in the dark, and suddenly the blackness ceased to feel comforting.

I started to panic. I felt a tsunami of blinding, uncontrollable claustrophobia.

The darkness was choking me, I was suffocating in it.

It closed in around me and I heard a the clang of metal, the scrape and swish of harsh fabric and I was outside, surrounded by golden daylight.

Luckily 1000+ years of burning in the sun's light had conditioned a reflex into me, I had had the presence of mind to put on my thick straw sun hat and mid-bicep length marigold gloves.

I knew I didn't have the strength to go back inside, the emptiness was too much.

So I closed my eyes and floated aimlessly, a sky-nomad with a home the wasn't a home that I had to escape.

Before I knew it I was picking up the scent of boiled sugar.

How had my wandering led me here?

Stupid subconscious.

Not one to give up halfway through, mostly for fear of being seen fleeing a bunch of candy-nerds, I kept my pace, scaring a few innocent marshmallows and attempting to suck the red out of the Butler of Peppermint, who promptly hissed at me, on my way to the palace.

The princess' room wasn't hard to breech: All I had to do was open the window, it was a good thing Bubbles had decided not to lock it today or there might have been a mess.

I gave the room a once-over, clean, pink and stinking of candy and royalty, as expected.

Bubblegum wasn't there, still out being royal, or whatever.

Now I was in, I'd run out of ideas, my plan had pretty much been to get in and go from there. It was the "going from there" part I was struggling with.

So I opted to sit on the elaborate, lilac and rose wardrobe and wait.

Again, for what I wasn't sure.

The princess? Yea, I guessed so.

And did she take her sweet time or what?

I sat for over and hour before I stopped counting the seconds, and then an age after that before the horizon started to swallow the sun. I watched the shadows form and stretch and darken and the pink shades of the room turn to blazing orange and angry red under the gaze of the day-star, and then another age before she actually got back.

By then a waxy yellow moon had crawled into the sky and tiny spots of glittering star surrounded it. Bubblegum's bedroom held an eerie silver glow as shafts of piercing silver moonlight penetrated through the curtains. The shadows moved and shifted to accommodate each other's darkness.

I removed my protective gear, now that it no longer served a purpose, and set it behind me.

The princess and ruler of the Candy Kingdom entered, her butler but two paces behind, bearing a lighted torch to brighten their path, which threw the darkness back into the shadowed areas, the blackness grew like a wave and flickered and licked the edges of where the light reached.

Royal and servant exchanged words and Peppermint Butler waddled towards the en suite to prepare a bath for the worn out princess.

(How could he look so evil when he was so cute?

The peppermint had a dark heart indeed.)

I had yet to be noticed and decided that, while the evil breath-mint was around, it should remain that way. Letting my body fully enhance its demonic qualities till I was nothing but shadow, I shrank into the wall behind me and crept up on the ceiling. Only others in possession of demon eyes could see me now.

The sound of smooth, tuneless humming and scent of floral soaps and cleansing oils found my sharp nose and ears. Bubblegum was having a bath.

I ignored the flutter in my stomach at this realisation, and flattened myself further again the ceiling as the Butler waddled briefly into the bedroom in search of the princess' night gown.

When he had once again been swallowed by the soft light of the bathroom I let out a breath I hadn't realised I was holding.

Man, that dude gave me the creeps.

I was lucky that Bonny dearest had had a long day, before long she was bidding her evil butler goodnight as he tottered out of the room on his tiny candy feet. The door closed softly behind him.

And then, in a very un-princess-like way, Bubblegum sagged against the door.

She looked exhausted.

I felt guilty, wanting to bug her when she was so tuckered out.

She crossed to that comfy, cushy looking bed of hers and flopped down like a ton of bricks, she barely had the strength to drag herself within the vicinity of a pillow before her breathing went soft and deep and she was fast asleep.

"Morning", I thought, before returning to my spot on the wardrobe, assuming postition, and slipping into a trance-like, meditative state.

(Yes, I meditate! I can't actually sleep like normal folks so its the closest I have. It's very relaxing to an overactive mind, you guys should try it...

You'll see, one day meditation will be huge, and I'll be the meditative, zen-queen, poster-girl Marceline.)

Morning came too quickly.

My meditation had been uneasy, consciousness filtering in and out constantly as totally unzen thoughts wormed their way through the cracks in my mental barriers.

When the moon was dipping into the western hills I gave up and wallowed in my thoughts till my skin started tingle so unpleasantly that I could no longer ignore it.

I knew what that meant.

I just managed to yank on my sun protective hat and gloves before first light had burst over the candy-horizon.

Phew.

Now I just really needed someone to talk to.

And that someone just happened to be waking up.

There was a fair amount of squirming going on below the bed sheets, the kind of wriggling you did when you knew you'd woken too early and you were too uncomfortable to drift off again.

"Morning, Bonnibell." I chimed from my spot on, cross-legged on the vulgarly pink wardrobe.

The pillows were privy to a grumble along the lines of "oh glob, what now?", before the sleepy princess lifted her gooey, pink, pillow-mussed head.

"For goodness sake, Marceline. It is one thing to bother me during the day but to..." Her violet eyes finally cracked open, resting on me, and she must have seen the state I was in.

I caught sight of my reflection in the large, full-length mirror across the room.

Heck, you'd have to be blind not to. I looked awful.

My long black hair hung limp and lifeless down my back, pooling at my butt where I sat. It was dull and tangled and messy.

My red eyes, once shocking scarlet, looked a dead, dried-blood brown. Once icy-grey skin was unhealthy grey-green, greasy and sallow, with chapped, no longer smirking, pale lips and dark, bruise-like circles under my wet eyes.

My clothes, once well fitted, hung loosely on my malnourished body.

"What happened?" It was the hoarse, shocked whisper that brought my eyes back to Bubblegum.

She was horrified.

"What happened?" Stronger now, her voice was. Laced with conviction and determination and a need to help.

My body moved of its own accord and now I was sitting across from her on her bed.

And it spilled out of my mouth like a waterfall, I told her everything.

I told her how lonely I was, all my problems, my heartache, my need for acceptance without attachment that I couldn't help but give, the way I saw the word through my cursed eyes and how it twisted me into what I was.

I gave her it all, and she swallowed it like medicine.

And then she hugged me and told me it would be ok, I would be ok, she'd make sure of that.

By now the sun had risen to half mast.

I knew Bubblegum would need to be getting on with her duties.

"You need to go." I said, as firmly as my tear shaken voice could manage.

Her purple orbs widened in shock and fear.

"No, I can't leave by yourself!"

"I'll be ok. I'll wait."

I gave her my most level-headed look and a reassuring smile.

"I'll be here when you get back." My voice was stronger than I felt. For some crazy reason, it worked.

Bubblegum gave in.

"Ok, I'll try not to be gone too long. Ring the bell if you need anything." Her hand waved towards a think, hot pink velvet robe with gold tassel that hung down for God-only-knew-where, beside the bed.

I nodded, and she left to go do... Whatever princesses do.

Heck, I don't know, I may be vampire queen but its not as if there are actually any vampires to govern.

I'm the queen of my own square footage, and that's about all I can handle, I want to ring my own neck half the time anyway.

Speaking of neck, my fingers twitched, I had a very sudden, very strong urge to play bass.

But I didn't have it with me.

I growled mentally, hadn't I promised Bubblegum that I'd wait here 'till she got back?

But then, when was I one for keeping promises?

I checked the window.

Locked. And I didn't have a key. And I'd be seen if I went out the door.

Stupid butler.

My eyes roamed the room, falling on a desk and a chair and the bathroom door.

I smiled, flashing fang in a, literally, wolfish grin.

Time to get inventive.

I worked all day on it.

And it was beautiful.

Crafted from several glass bottles, a roll of twine, a candy chair and a, frankly darling, set of letter openers I had constructed a candy bass guitar.

The chair I melted, using a little stolen magic from the fire kingdom (which I aquired on my travels) and shaped into the body, neck and headstalk, the glass made the bridge, humbuckers and frets, including some fancy inlays which had taken over two hours to craft. Twine acted as strings and the letter openers were tuning pegs.

I was so proud of it.

There was only one flaw. Since letter openers have a sharp end and I didn't want to be cutting myself on them when I tuned my new toy, I had fitted them so that the knife part stuck out the back of the headstalk.

What I hadn't counted on was my hand slipping as I fitted the last string and one such sharp implement burying itself into my wrist.

I cried out as pain shot up my arm and black blood gushed around the knife.

My first instinct was to yank it free and I did.

The flow from my wound increased tenfold. I panicked.

I had been working in the bathroom, sitting on the toilet so as not to make a mess of the carpet next door, so I flung my arm into the bath. Cut the opposite arm in my haste.

More life spilled from me.

I didn't know what to do.

(1000 years and I hadn't learned first aid. Idiot.)

What I did know what that the bath was fast filling with my dark blood, it splattered the tiled walls in its haste to leave me.

The more of the midnight liquid left me, the more my panic ebbed.

Time seemed to slow.

I felt like was hearing, seeing, everything from underwater.

Seconds took an eternity to pass by for a life in critical danger.

My head lolled forwards, bounced on the side of the bath. It hung like a blackout curtain around my head. It tunnelled till I could only look straight ahead at the blood splattered, ice white stone.

I couldn't tell if it was just dark blobs of blood, or if black spots were blurring my vision, I knew I was going to pass out.

That was when I heard it.

Her sweet, chirping voice, through the haze of near-death ecstasy.

"Marceline, I'm ba... OH MY GLOB!"

She was there. A blur of pink in the dark doorway.

She saw me.

I knew what it looked like.

I was too tired to speak, to explain, my tongue felt thick and useless in my mouth. I wasn't strong enough to lift it anymore.

I tried anyway.

"It's not... I didn't.. No..."

My vision swam and my head felt too light and everything went black.

Now, for those of you who aren't vampire experts, which I'd imagine would be a few of you, we have a... reflex.

Meaning when we (I say we...) are vulnerable, we do the whole coma thing like any other mammal (Are we mammals? I don't know. I'll need to look that up.), but the minute we have enough energy stored, we get this massive jolt of adrenaline, like an electric shock, and basically flip out like a penguin with rabies.

I'm lucky enough that Bubblegum was a aware of that fact, because when I went crazy, she was there and she was prepared.

The fist thing I felt when I woke up, besides the burn of fused pain and adrenaline, was a wave of panic.

The world was a haze of blood red.

Instinct kicked in before I could stop it and I was lashing out at anything within reach.

Fangs out and bared, demon eyes searching for my opponent, another crash of hysteria hit me like a truck and claws met candy (person or object I didn't know or care).

There was a harsh crack and the wall exploded behind me.

Then I was dodging the whatever-it-was, racing up the wall.

Another, the lighting fixture came apart. Flakes of loose plaster fell from the roof.

I was flipping onto the floor, facing the source of the sound.

Another, pain ripped through my shoulder. I shrieked like an injured animal, which I was. Black blood spurted, enthusiastically, from the new hole at the point where shoulder met collar-bone.

The urge to laugh bubbled in my throat and died when I collapsed forward.

Red eyes dragged upward through my over-grown fringe to look at a thoroughly shaken candy princess, her eyes wide with fear, her stance defensive. The gleaming black pistol in her hands trembled violently, even as she aimed it between my eyes.

I wasn't surprised she was in shock. She'd just shot me.

Her breathing was ragged, but I could see her relaxing as she realised that I had control of my body again.

The gun dropped to her side and a sarcastic, unprincess-like smirk tugged at her lips.

"You finished your tantrum yet, Marceline?"

"Says the chick who can't even shoot straight." I chucked wryly.

Trust us to bring out the worst in each other, right after almost killing each other.

"Um, thanks." Came my tired mumble when I realised I was being pulled onto a candy hospital bed. I could have been talking about her helping me up, but we both knew I wasn't.

When Bubblegum looked at me, it was with a reddish blush on her cheeks and warmth in her eyes.

"Don't mention it." She smiled, shyly. I weakly returned the favour, wincing with pain as I attempted to shrug, having somehow forgotten my injury.

I glanced down at the torn flesh with a grimace, that'd leave a nice scar. (Believe it or not, vampires do not have super-quick healing powers. I have learned this the hard way.)

"Can you put me under now Doc?" I asked, with my trademark smirk.

After all, there was still a rather large bullet-hole in my shoulder.

And the gummy princess giggled as she hooked me up to a drip and gave me a shot of that wonderful stuff that dragged me into velvety darkness.

Luckily for the Candy Kingdom's hospital staff, the next time I rose from my slumber, it was through slow lessening of anaesthetic, not a jolt to my system.

This meant that I got to spend a good few minutes in that lovely lucid-dream state just at the edge of consciousness, though when I was fully awake, my dream dissipated like steam in the air.

Before I was fully conscious (as in when I still had my eyes closed) I wondered why drugs still worked on me when I had no heartbeat or inner functions to speak of?

That was one to ask Bubblegum later, I decided.

When I was fully conscious, I felt rotten. The inside of my mouth was dry and tasted nasty, my eyes had filmed over with some sticky gunk I couldn't get rid of, my limbs felt unnaturally heavy and I could tell I smelled like something had died (no pun intended).

And through waking up alone I had exerted myself, I felt like i could sleep again.

Yawning and blinking lazily, I soon found that it was nighttime, though the exact time I wasn't sure of, I found no clock during my visual search of the room.

After what felt like a good five minutes I relented, but only because I was too weak to lift my head and straining my eyes wasn't doing my anything except giving me a headache.

I wondered how I got headaches.

Another question for the science princess Bonnibell.

A blinking red light beside my bed caught my fleeting attention, and my head flopped sideways so that my eyes could investigate.

It was one of those brain wave monitors, and I found my exhausted self entranced by hypnotic squiggles of light that danced across the screen for a moment before blinking and refocusing.

How long had I been out to warrant needing a brain monitor?

For a moment I found myself wondering why there was no heart monitor, before realising my mistake and allowing myself a small chuckle.

Vampire, no heartbeat, heart monitor would be useless.

My eyes rested again on the rhythmic rising and dipping of the brain monitor and I found that it gently lulled me back into a coma-like sleep.

And, surprisingly, for me anyway, I began to dream again.

There was soft, natural light emanating from somewhere in wherever-the-heck-I-was, but it most definitely wasn't sunlight. For starters, it was blue. Now, though I may not have seen the sun in a few years, I'm pretty sure it isn't blue.

It took dopey dream-me some time and a fair bit of uncharacteristically curious searching to realise that the light source was not anywhere in any immediate direction, though it appeared to be coming for everywhere and nowhere all at the same time. Almost like it was moving with me.

Brain wave!

Glancing down, I realised that, sure enough, this serene aqua-blue light was rising from my own skin.

Cool, I was bioluminescent. Like a squid.

I chuckled for a moment at the thought of a Marcy-squid.

And then my dream-nose got a whiff of something and my laughter died. Because, though it couldn't recognise or pinpoint the scent, (which was odd considering my heightened senses) it didn't like it. Not one little bit.

I sensed movement to my left, a scuttling beyond the reaches of my light, but didn't dare turn. Though I was now a walking lightbulb it wouldn't do for whatever-it-was to be riled by my demon eyes, they had a tendency to tick off beings that could easily tear my throat out.

(Not a trait I am particularly proud of, you can imagine.)

I closed my eyes and strained my other senses, ears and nose twitching, tongue flicking out like that of a snake, but it was like this creature was a ghost. It left no trail that I could detect.

My blue glow reached behind the skin of my eyelids.

So I could still sort of see it. So I caught it when it went out.

My eyes snapped open. I was flickering. Like a firefly that had been sprayed with Raid.

What the..?

And then I was in the dark, but it wasn't the comfortable dark of night and nature, it was absolute dark, it was the suffocating dark one experiences when they are alone with the object of their deepest fears.

Something brushed my back.

Before I could react I was already reacting.

My feet rocketed off the ground and I was sprinting at breakneck speed.

Lungs that didn't need air drank it in like ambrosia, eyes that didn't need to blink were drying out in the rushing air, a mouth that didn't salivate was chocking on natural fluid, feet that could ride the wind pounded the hard ground in an effort to get away.

Something wasn't right, my legs churned and my arms pumped but it was like I was a lagging Internet video: stationary one minute, jumping forth the next.

I noticed the lag only happened when my mind wasn't on running.

I heard a growl behind me.

Close, getting closer.

My mind was screaming at me.

Run away! Get away!

But I couldn't move.

Why couldn't I move!?

My limbs were heavy, frozen in place and there was nothing I could do to move them.

The presence of my nightmare beast was moving closer still.

Any moment I'd be dog food (assuming it was a dog).

Tension weighed on my shoulders like a boulder, building into a wave of desperate panic.

Then, just as the wave reached its peak, something gripped my hand.

I screamed.

"Marceline. Marceline! It's me, it's Bubblegum."

Violet eyes met my own and, immediately, I calmed. In my panic I had bolted to sit rod straight on the hospital bed. Now I was slouched, feeling the exhaustion that only came with nightmare wrought sleep.

Back met cotton sheets, I was panting.

I know I don't need to breath, but it makes me feel safe for some reason, like it couldn't be that bad if I still had access to air.

It took me a few minutes to get my panic-breathing under control, when I had, I noticed a strange pressure around my right palm.

Why it took me so long to realise that Bubblegum was holding my hand, I don't know. What I did know what that it was unexplainably comforting to feel her warm, dry palm on my cold, dead one. It just made me feel better.

Bubblegum waited until I actually looked at our fingers, threaded together to press our palms against each other, to glance sideways and blush, like a schoolgirl asking her crush out.

She didn't pull her hand away, I didn't want her to.

Summoning courage, she looked up at me. I smiled and she smiled back.

Vampires may not have freaky fast healing powers, but their rate of restoration is a little faster than average. So, though I consumed copious amounts of red, and a little actual blood (thanks Finn) to really get the ball rolling, I was up and about in 10 days or so.

Now I was doing everything I could to stay away from my cave, it was a place of stark loneliness to me now, so I avoided the dark hole like the plague.

I hung around Bubblegum like a bad smell when she was off duty and, oddly, she never once told me to go away. In fact, we were getting along a lot better, smiling and laughing with each other like old friends. She was actually a lot of fun to be around when she wasn't treating me like a child and not the mature woman of 1000 I was. (I'd never tell her, but I could teach her things about science she'd never learn through conventional testing. Yes, I dappled in the scientific arts.)

When the princess was off princess-ing, I hung out with the dynamic duo, Finn and Jake. We jammed a lot, the guys really liked my new candy bass (which Bubblegum had salvaged for me from the shattered pieces she'd found on the floor after... That incident. For this I am eternally grateful.)

And on those few occasions when I was alone, I stopped thinking on my loneliness, because, it had taken me this long to realise, there was a difference between being lonely and being alone. I used to be lonely, used to try to fill up the hole with things I knew would never give me more than fleeting freedom.

But now I'd started giving bits of myself away to people, and in return they gave parts of themselves to me, and I wasn't lonely anymore, because I knew they were with me in those part of them I kept in my undead heart.

When I thought about all of this I could almost feel it beating again, pumping with the realisation of happiness, and that I'd never again feel like it would be better to cease to exist than to live like this anymore.

I felt whole, and it was beautiful.

So beautiful I could sing.

"When you found me I was broken,

And you took it upon yourself,

To find my shattered pieces,

And put them back together,

I hope you know,

How much that means to me,

I was so lost,

So lost until you found me."

This time, when I "ran out of words" it was with almost-tears of joy, little choked sobs of happiness that I couldn't, and didn't want to hold back.

And yet I knew that such feelings could only last so long. Though I'd never be lonely again, something had to rain on my proverbial parade.

Except it didn't rain, it hailed.

I think it was three weeks until I realised what was wrong with me.

Three whole weeks after my recovery, five after all of it started.

The exact moment when my epiphany struck was on a rainy Thursday afternoon, I was talking to Bubblegum (did I ever call her Bonnibell anymore? No, not really.) about some letters that the devil peppermint had handed her in a heck of a hurry.

They looked pretty darn fancy and smelled pretty darn exotic, but so did everything in this word of sweet luxury that housed princesses and the like.

"So, what are they for?" I had asked, nonchalantly, floating about a foot over Bubble's head to peek at the scribbly sprawls of calligraphy on each thick, expensive, bordered, scented page.

"Letters." Had come the reply.

"I can see that," I snorted," what are they for? What do they say?"

That was the split second before my word crashed down around my pointy, grey ears, because in the moment that followed I heard the candy princess I had come to know so well in such a short time say:

"They are letters from my princely suitors."

I don't think she heard my guts fall out, or my heart explode, or my brain scream all the things I didn't know up until I heard that sentence, because she kept talking.

"As I will be crowned queen of the Candy Kingdom on my twentieth birthday, at the end of this year, I am required to marry a prince from one of our allied kingdoms to strengthen bonds between us. It is tradition, and it would be highly frowned upon if I were to break tradition, so much so that to do so would certainly cause war between the allied kingdoms."

Intellectually, I knew that it made sense, but I had yet to accept or really understand it.

It was that underwater feeling again. The one I had just before I passed out, before I almost died again.

I needed to be on my own for a bit.

"Oh, sorry Bubbs, I forgot I have a... A thing. Well, s'later!" I flashed her a fake grin, mock-saluted and was out the window before my eyes had time to register the shock on her face, or I had time to show the pain on mine.

In my haste, I forgot my candy bass.

Honestly, after the first few hours of making steam blow out of my ears due to intense thinking, I very much lost track of time. In fact, when I came back from the Ice Kingdom (I'd been hiding out in a mountain which I'd hollowed out with my fire) I'd been gone several days, not the several hours it felt like.

Thank goodness I didn't need sleep.

The upside to taking this much time to get my head all sorted and filed neatly was that I knew exactly what I had to do.

I flew back into my cave (it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be) and wrote three letters.

Each of them were written with the same words: "Try not to miss me too much, see you soon, Marceline. xx"

Then, I found my ancient backpack and filled it with useless junk that meant stuff to me, like Hambo and that pixie skull Finn got me when he found out it was my 1005th birthday last year, and useful stuff that I knew would come in useful, like cash and clothes and a couple magic orbs I'd stolen from wizard city when I snuck in.

I almost left my axe-bass, but decided against it.

When I was all done, I stood outside my cave-home, backpack on my back letters in one hand, a match in the other.

I knew it was drastic, but there were too many memories, too many things I wanted to get rid of from before and after this little wooden house was built. And sometimes, drastic was what you needed to move on.

Goodbye, memories.

Striking it against a rock, I flicked the lit match with its dancing light at my old home and watched the flames devour it.

It was like I was burning my old self to make way for a new me.

I left my letters, one for Finn, one for Jake, one for Bubblegum, under their pillows like the tooth fairy.

Then I flew up high, so that I could see Ooh in all of its nighttime glory, peaceful and quiet, and I blew it a kiss.

My mental picture taken, I left.

"Bye, guys."

Bye, Ooh.

Bye, home.

Bye, Finn and Jake.

Bye, Bubblegum.

I'll be back one day, and I'll make sure that day isn't too far away, but I don't think I can stand by and watch Bubblegum walk down the isle. Not now I know my feelings.

But it's ok, I won't be lonely. You showed me how to keep a person close to you, no matter how far away they are.

So, if I can do that: if I can keep you all close despite the distance, if I can remember your faces, if I can remember your voices, if I can remember the times we spent laughing at nothing and making music and watching bad movies and just sitting in comfortable silence, I won't be lonely. Because I'll have all of you. For me, it'll be like I never left.

And like I said, I'll be back, I just need time to accept what it's too hard to face right now.

And I'll remember what you all taught me; there's a difference between being lonely, and being alone.


End file.
